I recently received an email from a reader whose marriage was headed for divorce. She was worried for herself and her children, and concerned that she could no longer live Proverbs 31. This is my response to her…
God raised marriage to the dignity of a sacrament, a sacred sign of love and unity between yourself and your spouse, the Church. He gave married couples the grace they need to live together in love and harmony. Jesus decreed that marriage was to be a livelong commitment.
Yet, sometimes that grace seems out of reach for you and the one you once loved and married. Your love has vanished, your marriage has faltered and your children have certainly been harmed. At times like this, pray that God will teach you both how to regain what has been lost, to change all that can be changed and to accept whatever cannot be changed.
It may not be God’s will that you be restored to a life together. Ask God to keep you from regret, resentment and fear. Ask for His divine mercy upon your children, your spouse and yourself. Pray that the problems that led to this situation may be the occasion for growth in both of you, and will lead you to greater respect for each other, mutual pardon and deeper faith.
Don’t think that God is punishing you. God doesn’t punish. He loves us unconditionally and He knows we’re all imperfect. And don’t punish yourself. It wasn’t meant to be, that’s all. Don’t give up. God loves you and you need to have faith and trust in Him. Things work out for the best, and someday you will look back and understand why things happened the way they did. Stay strong and remember that God loves you and is always with you. That is what living Proverbs 31 is all about!